omelette

yesterday i stayed home all day.
this with the mindset of studying all day.
which i guess went somewhat successful excluding those random hours of getting lost
in a daydream and thus falling asleep to dream.

so yesterday it hit me that i'm nineteen.
my last year of being a teen.
i'm a sophomore in college halfway done. if i don't stay another year that is.

where'd did time go?
i have a chem midterm tomorrow as well as a domestic gangs paper due.
a biology quiz tuesday, an anthro paper due next week and i need to plan
my schedule for next quarter. there's a family dinner friday as well as grand's birthday.
there's no such thing as free time i noticed.

even though technically the time i'm spending here on my laptop making this blog can be considered using my free time...
i like to call it procrastinating.

it seems i've reverted to my awkward pre teen stage
since i don't know how to hold myself up anymore.
apathetic.
ignorant.
happy.
mad.
who know's what i'll look to someone the following day.
staying in makes me think too much on how i stand especially in the eyes of others.

i wish i could just read books all day.
or attempt to make the perfect omelette.
just me my ingredients and my skillet pan.
putting all thoses new additions into the mix
in hopes of it tasting pretty awesome.