i want to sleep knowing that when i wake up i'll be better prepared for tomorrow.
it could be because of my binge of full metal that's putting me in this mood
or it may be that refreshing feeling of meeting new faces while bonding with the old.

the wonders of the rain and how much it forces you to think.

i spent so much on myself and on others.
but in reality i know i should have just saved it to make things easier for my parents.
to make it so i understand discipline and control again.

so i can look at pictures and not feel like i look like shit.
i need my discipline.
i need my motivation back.
if i want change i need to become it.

it won't just happen i have to fight for it.

not gonna lie tho i wish i had someone to tell me the progress i've made.
the growth i've gone through.
how proud they are of me.

i'm glad i can be a fighter
but in reality i miss being taken care of.
where i used to never feel the need to curse.

wake up to a new day right.
with a smile to get me going.

almost the new year.
i have something to look forward to yes?