I will be as happy as I can as much as I can.

I may want him to be there at family parties.

It's almost a year and my family knows nothing about him

which makes me sad.

I want him to spend Turkey day with us but he has to be with his family.

Christmas I doubt it, New Years he won't have fun...

I can't get disappointed though.

As happy as I'd really be seeing him at my family holidays...he'll feel awkward and alone.

it's fine. 

Maybe next year?

Just one?

This is probably my last thing that makes me sad about "us"

My family will wonder who is he why won't he make the effort of coming out to get to know the Redublo's. My brother will be disappointed..

That's why it bothers me so much.

I feel like I'm letting them down. They don't get to meet the guy who's the reason I like to stay in Irvine instead of go home home. 

It's okay. I guess family will always be separate when it comes to him and my family. 

I can't be selfish anymore anyways.

I told him give me one last chance. 

So I'll take it.