how fitting

so i was listening to one of my friends covers ( you should listen by the way. subscribe! ) and i found it so fitting with my mood for some reason.
it's been awhile since i've written here just to write.
not because i was mad
not because i was sad
or yearning.
it's just me.

i'm so happy i have friends who are passionate in so many different ways. one who knows how to work the digital world/art, a few who will actually go through with med school, one who lives by the motto of live, laugh, and love, and many who love dancing. ambition and passion is always a turn on. i hope one day i can be that kind of woman who has those qualities. or that one day i may meet someone with that. aw man i'm doing my yearning thing again. k move on.

this whole week i got what i wished for. i've been busy with my internship, work, school, aphio, pcn and even a social life somehow. i've got to see and hang out with the people i did miss. the ppl who although i may not be with them often i know i can truly call them my friends. i shouldn't say i don't have friends anymore. that's stupid.
we started dance comp again. holy crap i missed it. sigh. i'm back to how it used to be. wishing for love again. trying to forget the past. reverting to my old ways. of course my heart gets heavy at times. but all i can do is distract myself with that which makes me. spring break to first week has been pretty awesome. going to sd, seeing aphio friends, finding how much i care for my family.
you think i'm the one who doesn't have my priorities straight. sorry kid you're mistaken.
it's like i have everything i wanted. everything that i knew i had in my life is resurfacing. if there is one thing i learned it's to just be me. he made it so i can't ever let another person in like that. i don't want to anymore. say i meet someone in the future. i don't know if i can share my whole self. not until he's ready to share all of him.
i put all his stuff in a bag in my closet. sorry not in the box to the left but just a big bag. i still wear his sweaters to sleep tho because they're comfy and i sleep with jafong. it's a stuffed animal turtle. i'm kinda weird and talk to him sometimes but shh. he's my confidant don't mess.

i watched cool kids, b.o.b, and common yday. i went to fusion for the first time. i get called by old friends now.

yea i do things on my own. i always have. don't think i stay home and act pathetic missing you. i do miss you. i still love you. but i'm living my life. i hope you are too. find yourself before you share yourself with someone you love. thank you for that lesson.