Naked

Strength in my solitude.

I need to learn to accept that at times I will have to do things on my own. I feel I've become TOO dependent on the companionship of others to really appreciate the strength I know I possess. My mind knows what expectations to give myself and yet I go for the security. I become weak and turn to those who I know are always there and so we end up stagnant in our search for our Self.

I blame the short spurts of comfort and happiness I get from people but I notice I usually am quiet and reserved with a group. I do not act like how I feel most as myself because there are those who I haven't truly shown myself too.

I think it's because I feel like that close group of people it took time and trust for them to see me. They became my security blanket.
Now it's time for me to open up.
To not run in fear and hide under that blanket.
I need to be open to others, to strangers even.
So that when I do talk to other I feel that same comfort with them as I do with my closest friends.
I knew this growing up stuff was going to be hard. But I didn't expect it to cause me to expose myself. To force myself to be naked.

When I work out the hardest part is starting it.
Same with this idea, I suppose.
Not that I will seclude myself from my friends. But I need to not depend solely on them for my happiness.
Happiness is my perception of the world. My own perception.